World of Shekhar (Blind Love)
This is the opening shot of Shekar. Please excuse this nitpick but why the fuck does he have baseball bat? I have noticed this in other movies too. Who the fuck plays baseball in India? *ugh*
This is the love story of a stammering man named Shekhar and a blind girl named Radhika (Sai Dhansika). The story spans over four years. They fall in love, she gets pregnant, they get married, the families make the obligatory fuzz, she dies while giving birth (of course she does) and he’s left with his kid.
This element for this story is water. You probably know that already because Bejoy Nambiar was screaming it using the visuals throughout this segment. This segment is also a giant Kochi tourism advertisement.
The story is fairly sweet on paper but on-screen it’s just dull and boring. One reason is the weak script (which I mentioned earlier) and horrible dubbing (which gets progressively worse in the later segments) Shekar’s stammering and Radhikas Malayalam lip syncing was noticeably bad. It wasn’t a dubbing disaster like ‘Nee-Na’. Anyone remember Deepthi Sati in that movie? You don’t? I’m glad.
The relationship was underdeveloped and rushed. It was unconvincing just like every other movie relationship that includes a person who has some disability. It’s a kind of pet peeve but I don’t buy it. For me they are just as unconvincing as the dumb ass action scenes where the bad guy literally flies away with a kick from the hero. The whole point of movies in general is suspension of disbelief. So i guess that’s okay.
(I’m not hating on Bangalore Days. It is a good movie and i did enjoy it. But this whole thing was a bunch of bullshit.)
Dulquer Salman did an okay job with the character but a horrible job with the dubbing. And discount Rima Kalligal played the most unconvincing blind girl I’ve ever seen.
Come on, i can’t be the only one! When I first saw this poster I honestly thought it was Rima Kallingal. Maybe they first approached Rima and after reading the script, maybe she told them to go fuck themselves. Who knows?
The entire wedding sequence was cringe. They ruined an amazing song. And, exactly what the fuck was going on? People are dancing awfully throughout the scene even during the wedding ceremony. There’s couple of ladies with chendas for some reason despite there’s a song playing during the whole scene.
World of Trilok (The cyclist)
This is the story of Dr. Trilok. Basically what happens is Triloks wife was accidentally killed by two people and he hunts them down and kills them. It is pretty enjoyable. Other than the suspense there isn’t anything worth praising. There are some things that genuinely pissed me off.
Before the movie came out there was a lot of talk about the women in SOLO. Well, despite being important aspects of every story, the women have nothing to do with the movie. They’re all their because they’re hot. That’s it. I’m not saying you have to have strong female characters. But since you had a whole marketing aspect specifically for the ‘women in SOLO’, I expected to have some. Discount Rima Kallingal, Ann Augustine and Sai Tamhankar was kind of good and that all you’re gonna get. It’s all downhill from there.
The women in this story is named Ayesha played by someone who I didn’t bother to find the real name. She is in this movie because of 3 reasons.
2. Knows how to ride a bicycle
On earphones it might sound fine but the people who watched it in theaters know what I’m talking about. It was just loud noises. I had no idea what was happening. Who is shooting what or where is the sound coming from. Sound engineer and whoever was in charge of mixing did an awful job. It was just noise.
THIS FUCKING GUY.
Another thing that didn’t make sense is this. Manoj. K. Jayans character is telling Shiva’s brother- “oru pullanum illatha sthalathu poi vende adikkan? athokke ninte chettan!”.
*18 minutes later*
Okay. This is where Everything went south. If i have to pinpoint the exact moment it is this.
This is the story about a military trainee named Rudra who is the son of a brigadier. He has girlfriend who the daughter of some other military douche. Anyway, whenever someone comes to the girls house for a marriage proposal, Rudra goes to that house challenges them to a fist fight if the person win he can have the girl. Because that is what men do. (Oh and this story is set in the 2010’s and not in the middle ages). And the usual Indian movie bullshit happened. She was sent to study abroad but she promises Rudra she’ll always be his. But Rudra never heard from her again. And years back Rudra and a bunch of his stupid fucking horribly dubbed friends set out to find why.
You all probably know the story so I’m not gonna explain it further.
This segment is the most cringe to ever put on film. I have never cringed so hard ever. I was cringing so hard I could feel physical pain. I was cringing so hard my body was in pain I was almost in a fetal position throughout the proposal scene and that stupid fucking song called Roshomon. Why why why???!!!!
The so-called twist was executed so terribly it ended up being fucking stupid and unfunny. Just like almost everything in this movie, it sound good on paper but the execution is a clusterfuck. Dulquer was claiming that was dark humor and the people didn’t like it because they didn’t get it. I’m no expert in comedy but I think I have seen my fair share of dark comedies. And whatever the fuck was on Rudra wasn’t dark humor or any humor for that matter. You can’t defend your incompetence claiming that its dark humor or the audience just didn’t get it. It’s funny because people had no problem understanding and enjoying the dark humor in ‘Thondimuthalum Driksakshiyum’ which came out just around the time of SOLO. The problem wasn’t the audience who didn’t get it, the problem was a director and a writer who didn’t knew what the fuck the were doing.
Just take the L.
This movie had the biggest and most obnoxious marketing I could think of. At first when I saw the teaser for Shiva, I was pretty excited. Then they started flooding YouTube with teasers, songs, jukebox and whole bunch of other shit. Every time I go on YouTube and something related to this movie is there. I like watching movies with little to no knowledge of it at all. Despite me clicking ‘not interested’ over and over again it kept on coming back. I was honestly annoyed by the stupid fucking marketing.
An important thing about marketing is you need to know the product and the customers well. The SOLO marketing team really overestimated the movie and really underestimated the malayali audience. Bejoy Nambiar made some gorgeous garbage for idiots and thought the audience were going to swallow it just like that. Some of them did, but the majority didn’t. Because at the end of the day, no one really cares how hot the actresses are or how cool the hero is or how awesome the music is-all people care about is if it has any substance. SOLO had everything except that.
One trend I saw last year in Malayalam movies are the best movies came out with just the minimum amount of marketing. Movies like Angamaly Diaries, Mayanadhi and Thondimuthal just had a trailer and that’s it. Parava didn’t even have a trailer! The marketing strategy for all these movies were word of mouth and through the social media of the personnel. Especially Mayanadhi, it was released around Christmas along with many other huge releases like Aadu 2. When i went to watch Mayandhi maybe four days after it was released. There were 7 people in the theater (yes, i counted) and Aadu 2 tickets were sold out. But once all the hype surrounding the other movies settled and the people who have seen Mayanadhi had great opinions, lot more people wanted to watch the movie. And after a week or so i saw a great amount of people outside the theater where Mayanadhi was running. The movie later had screenings all over India and all over the world. It made me really happy and joyful for some reason.
And it worked for Mayanadhi because it was a good fucking movie.
The whole tragedy of SOLO can be explained using the ‘Kottayam Kunjachan’ analogy. In the movie ‘Kottayam Kunjachan’, Kunjachan(Mammooty) was opening a driving school. He said to everyone that Mohanlal was coming for the inauguration. He made the event really popular and important. He created mad hype around the event. He kept on saying Mohanlal was coming. And then the inauguration day finally arrived, the whole town was there expecting Mohanlal. Turns out Mohanlal was never coming and Kunjachan’ was bullshiting everyone to have a huge crowd at the inauguration. Kunjachan then brings Pachakulam Vasu and he did the inauguration. All the people were genuinely got pissed and angry because Kunjachan has been telling them Mohanlal is coming and they ended up with Vasu. Of course they got little aggressive and violent and the whole inauguration ceremony was a huge mess.
This is exactly what happened to SOLO. Kunjachan is the SOLO crew and the marketing team, Mohanlal was what they claimed SOLO would be and Pachakulam Vasu is what we saw in theaters.
At the end of the day, we are left wondering who SOLO’s audience is . It is too stupid and incompetent for the cinephiles. It is too unconventional for the fanboys who’s got bone in their brains. This was quite a difficult conundrum. And then I witnessed some things from some of the SOLO apologists.
And this man who has next level cinematic knowledge he makes Roger Ebert look like a nobody, who is defending SOLO but have no idea what the fuck he is defending.
And at this very moment, I figured it out! it was right in front of my face. SOLO is for the fanboys with bone in their brains, who pretend to be cinephiles.
At the end of the day, all of this is just my opinion. We all are allowed to have our own thoughts and opinions so you don’t have to agree with me. But, just so you know – you’re wrong.
Roses are red, violets are blue, Kali benda mwone, adares thada.
Thank you, amazing person who’s reading this and I hope you are doing well!